Category Archives: weeds

Noxious Weed; A Bad Poem


image from

Some people call it Montbretia
Crocosmia’s it’s other name
It reproduces under the ground
From corms which have no shame

So when you pull up the visible plant
And throw it in the bin
The parent produces baby corms…
It’s a fight you’re unlikely to win.

Some say a strong dose of Glysophate
May possibly do the trick
But although I despise the atom bomb
I say the answer’s to nuke it.

This terrible poem was inspired by today’s gardening, and this useful and informative website:

In the United States the Monbretia is recognised as a noxious weed. As such it may not be sold, propagated or knowingly distributed. How I wish it were so in this country. A few years ago somebody deliberately planted it all over the garden I am working on. This person was actually given an allowance of £100 a year, and she spent some of that money on Montbretia!

There is also mint at the back of the border. That will have to go into a pot before it tries to take the place of the montbretia. There’s wild garlic in the bit around the corner, and I wonder whether that was planted deliberately. Delicious though it is, an ornamental garden is not the right place for it. However, I may try potting that up too. I wouldn’t be surprised to discover a patch of Japanese Knotweed tucked away somewhere, – although, having said that, its not a particularly shy plant, and if there was any, it would be inviting itself into the neighbors’ living rooms  by now, and drinking their coffee while they sleep.

I have collected lots of plants to put into the garden. I’m now wondering whether it’s a good idea at the moment, as I doubt that all the montbretia corms are gone, and if not, they’ll just choke my sweet babies.

On a more positive note, I’ve been informed that, subject to the approval of some committee or other, I will also receive £100 a year to puchase plants. Well, I’m more likely to spend that on seeds and potting compost!. Even if I had a fondness for buying ready-grown plants, that money wouldn’t go far.

In addition, the supervisor of the care team says that if I plan to get special educational needs residents on board, she’ll organize fund-raising for additional tools.Now all I need is to get said SEN residents interested!

© Jane Paterson Basil